Through a Glass, Darkly...

I rarely look out my household windows.  I am somewhat of a recluse when I am alone.  I prefer dark, not really big on "natural lighting." However, sometimes I decide to open the blinds to let in a little light and I ALWAYS notice that my windows seem dirty.

I currently live in the high Chihuahuan Desert of West Texas at about 4,500 feet elevation.  It is usually pretty dry around here and the wind blows a lot.  It is NOT uncommon to experience dust storms in the spring and summer time.  The combination of windy and dusty goes a long way to contributing to my dirty windows.  I DO NOT ENJOY LOOKING OUT DIRTY WINDOWS, and I do not like washing windows either.

Dirty windows never give a pleasant view.  Dirty windows can obscure our vision.

I have been reading 1 Corinthians 13 quite often lately across several different translations/transliterations/ paraphrases of the Bible.  I am trying to surround myself in the knowledge of what LOVE is so I can live out what LOVE is.  While reading today, the phrase that is the title of this post stood out to me, as well as the rest of the verse.  1 Corinthians 13:12 (KJV):

For now we see through a glass, darkly; but then face to face: now I know in part; but then shall I know even as also I am known.

Right now, no matter how much we study, how hard we try, we are still looking for and at God with our human eyes which equate to looking through dirty windows; we can never fully and clearly picture what and who God is.  There will come a day, when the veil of the dirty windows will be removed.  Our spiritual eyes will be opened and we will see in person, God.  Our current, limited understanding will be replaced and we will know God as He knows us (completely).

WOW! I want to wash my windows right now and just catch a glimpse of God. I want to know!

But, alas, now is not yet that time... Even so, come, Lord Jesus.

Dear Father, the anticipation of knowing is hard Lord.  Grant me the patience to endure the wait.  I desire to see You face to face and know You completely, even if it will take an eternity to process the glory and beauty You are.  Thank You, Father, for this promise

Love Extravagantly

I heard this phrase the other day.  I am sure I have heard it before, but this time it piqued my interest as I am trying to learn to love again (Ok, I will admit, I am learning to love truly for the first time as God intended it, previously I could not claim the qualities of love as my own.  I was winging it.).

Love Extravagantly

Has a great ring to it.  Very "buzz worthy."  But what does it mean?


From the FreeDictionary.com website:

ex·trav·a·gant  adj.
1. Given to lavish or imprudent expenditure: extravagant members of the imperial court.2. Exceeding reasonable bounds: extravagant demands. See Synonyms at excessive. (Maybe?)3. Extremely abundant; profuse: extravagant vegetation. (Oh YEAH!)4. Unreasonably high; exorbitant: extravagant fees. (Not so much, love should be free.)
5. Archaic Straying beyond limits or bounds; wandering. (Hmmm...I like this, LOVE ALL OVER THE PLACE!)

ex·trava·gant·ly adv.

The American Heritage® Dictionary of the English Language, Fourth Edition copyright ©2000 by Houghton Mifflin Company. Update

So based on the definitions I think are fitting for our little adventure, 2.(?), 3., and 5; here we go.

To Love Extravagantly is to Love:

1. Beyond reason (going above and beyond).
2. Everyone (abundantly, enough to go around to all!).
3. Beyond limits and everywhere (when you think you have loved enough, love more!).

Wow.  That convicts me.  I know I need to work on this A LOT.  I love from convenience.  I shelter myself from people to not have to love strangers.  I stay at home alone and "love" through electronic media my "Cardboard cutout friends" (That was my phrase I used to use in the early days of the internet when my (x)wife (before she was my x) discovered chat rooms and e-mail strings and got very involved with them to the point I felt neglected, but then since I was not loving her as she needed to be loved, I can't blame her).

The source of this phrase, at least from the point where I will reference it, is the Message Version of the Bible in 1 Corinthians 13.  It is actually in the final verse 13:13, but I will present the entire chapter since the Transliteration/Paraphrase is apt:

If I speak with human eloquence and angelic ecstasy but don't love, I'm nothing but the creaking of a rusty gate. If I speak God's Word with power, revealing all his mysteries and making everything plain as day, and if I have faith that says to a mountain, "Jump," and it jumps, but I don't love, I'm nothing.  If I give everything I own to the poor and even go to the stake to be burned as a martyr, but I don't love, I've gotten nowhere. So, no matter what I say, what I believe, and what I do, I'm bankrupt without love. 

Love never gives up.

Love cares more for others than for self. 

Love doesn't want what it doesn't have. 

Love doesn't strut, 

Doesn't have a swelled head, 

Doesn't force itself on others,

Isn't always "me first," 

Doesn't fly off the handle, 

Doesn't keep score of the sins of others, 

Doesn't revel when others grovel, 

Takes pleasure in the flowering of truth, 

Puts up with anything, 

Trusts God always, 

Always looks for the best, 

Never looks back, 

But keeps going to the end.

Love never dies. Inspired speech will be over some day; praying in tongues will end; understanding will reach its limit. We know only a portion of the truth, and what we say about God is always incomplete. But when the Complete arrives, our incompletes will be canceled.  When I was an infant at my mother's breast, I gurgled and cooed like any infant. When I grew up, I left those infant ways for good.

We don't yet see things clearly. We're squinting in a fog, peering through a mist. But it won't be long before the weather clears and the sun shines bright! We'll see it all then, see it all as clearly as God sees us, knowing him directly just as he knows us!  But for right now, until that completeness, we have three things to do to lead us toward that consummation: Trust steadily in God, hope unswervingly, love extravagantly. And the best of the three is love.

The Message (MSG) Copyright © 1993, 1994, 1995, 1996, 2000, 2001, 2002 by Eugene H. Peterson

I have bolded and used red font for the characteristics of love.  We should be reading this every day asking ourselves:
"When I love, do I give up?" I did.  Now I am trying to get back in the game!
"When I love, do I care more for the other, than me?" I was selfish, trying to learn self-less-ness!
"When I love, do I want more than is there?" I did, I wanted things my way. Now, one day at a time is enough, what is, is.
"When I love, am I proud and seeming to seek attention for what I have done 'In Love'"? Probably, I called attention to how much I would "sacrifice" for those I loved.  Now, I just want to serve.

You get the idea...

When we conduct an active and honest self-inspection, we will probably surprise ourselves with what we find!

In the final verses, we see that we are incomplete, waiting for our completion in Christ upon His return.Until then, we are given the commands to:
Trust Steadily in God:  keep trusting everyday no wavering between trust and doubt.  Be consistent.
Hope Unswervingly: do not lose your course.  Keep heading in the right direction.
Love Extravagantly: as we have covered here.  Above and beyond, to everyone, everywhere, and more than you thought you could!

Because: THE BEST OF THESE IS LOVE

Dear Father, teach me to love extravagantly.  Clear my mind of what I think I know about love and teach me what You have designed it to be.  Teach me to love my (x)Wife, my children, my family, my friends, my coworkers, my neighbors, my town, my state, my country, everyone and everything as You want me to.  Show me where and how to apply this lesson Father.  You have a plan, that is good and bigger than me.  I look forward to seeing the wonders You have in mind. Amen

Rejoice and Be Glad

A Little Less Talk...

For the past two years, I have been struggling with something that has (I am sure) been a part of my life as long as I would care to remember: lack of follow-through.

Don't get me wrong, professionally I do a decent job (my bosses at least seem to think so) of doing what I say I will do, and accomplishing my tasks.  On the personal side of things, I fail miserably.  I will say something and then fail to back it up, or offer no proof or evidence of my statement's validity.

I have a friend who does not mince words.  Whenever someone tells her they will do something, she always replies, "Don't tell me, show me."

That may seem a bit harsh, but the message is clear: actions speak louder than words.

Words are easy.  Words are free.  But how often do we really measure the cost of what we say we will do.  We need to stop talking and start doing.  A little less talk, and a lot more action.

The apostle John basically tells us this in one of his epistles:

1 John 3:18 (KJV)

"My little children, let us not love in word, neither in tongue; but in deed and in truth."

When I was researching this verse and studying it out some, I came across this entry from the Robert Jamieson, A. R. Fausset and David Brown Commentary Critical and Explanatory on the Whole Bible (1871).  The commentary authors quote St. Jerome (347-420) and his biography of the apostle John:

"When the venerable John could no longer walk to the meetings of the Church but was borne thither by his disciples, he always uttered the same address to the Church; he reminded them of that one commandment which he had received from Christ Himself, as comprising all the rest, and forming the distinction of the new covenant, "My little children, love one another." When the brethren present, wearied of hearing the same thing so often, asked why he always repeated the same thing, he replied, "Because it is the commandment of the Lord, and if this one thing be attained, it is enough" [St. Jerome On Illustrious Men]."

 The J-F-B Commentary is in the public domain, and available in its entirety online.

"If this one thing be attained, it is enough."

The apostle John, the apostle Jesus "loved," understood.  And not to be blasphemous, but the Beatles did too, "All you need is love."

If we can figure out how to love (not just say it, but DO IT), imagine where we could be.

Lord, teach me to love as You loved, through action and not just words.

Rejoice and be glad.

As You Wish

Please excuse me for a moment, but I am going to go back 26 years to (IMHO) one of the greatest movies ever made.  This is not random, there is a point to it.  I promise.

The Princess Bride is a 1987 American romantic comedy adventure film directed by Rob Reiner and based on the 1973 novel of the same name and a screenplay by William Goldman.  ~Stolen from Wikipedia

Where I am going with this:

On Friday (August 3rd, 2012), I was in Midland under going the inpatient part of my chemo therapy.  This entails having blood labs drawn (about 4-5 vials) for a CBC and several other tests.  After that, I speak with the nurse for preliminary interview and vitals.  Then the Dr. comes in and she listens to me wonder if I am as "sick" as all these tests say because I do NOT feel sick.  She assures me that all the tests are correct and I am sick, and I should be thankful that this is going very well..  Yada, yada, yada...

Anyway, when I am in the chemo administration area, I am basically stuck there for 3-4 hours.  I am administered 3 drugs by IV into my Port-a-Cath.  Once the three drugs are in, I get my portable IV pump connected and I can leave for about 46 hours until it is time for it to be removed.

Needless to say, during this time in the admin area, I am bored.  Sometimes, there are other patients sitting nearby who want to chat, and I oblige, since it helps pass the time and with my treatment schedule usually the same patients are there.  Seating is random, depends on which RN/Tech attends to you for hooking up.  Today I was sequestered into an area where no one really wanted to speak, so I was looking for things to do.

I was texting, reading a book, reading my Kindle, playing Words with Friends, and commenting on Instagram photos from people, including my (x)Wife.

She posted a picture of some yummy, delicious looking Georgia Peaches which she will be bringing to me when she and the kids arrive on Sunday afternoon/evening.  When she posted the picture, she commented "As you wish."  I was forced by my nerdiness to reply by telling her how awesome she was, and telling her that it made me think of Princess Bride and the relationship Westley and Buttercup had.

So...

Here is the plot as it applies to this posting:

A beautiful young woman named Buttercup (Robin Wright) lives on a farm in the fictional country of Florin. Whenever she gives her farmhand Westley (Cary Elwes) an order, he answers "as you wish," and happily complies. ~This too was stolen from Wikipedia!

As time went on, Buttercup realized that she and Westley were in love.  Due to his standing as a farmhand he could not confess his love to her.  Buttercup came to understand that whenever Westley replied, 'As you wish,' what he was saying was, 'I love you.'

No, REALLY, where is he going with this...

The attitude that Westley displayed should be our attitude in everything we do.  We are told in Colossians 3:23-24 (NIV):

Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving.

No matter what task we have been give, we need to complete it as though God asked us to do it personally.  Our efforts as a servant should stem from our love: our love of God and our love towards our fellow man (even the ones we do not like).  We should comply not because we will get recognized or rewarded by whom we are serving, but because we love God and know the only reward that matters is awaiting us.

For the past couple years, I have adopted a saying, "I live to serve."  Some people think I am saying it flippantly when I state this.  I am not.  If I am asked to do something that is within my talents or means to assist, I will render aid.  God, thankfully knows me well enough to not allow anything which would be an epic fail and loss testimony to come my way.

I do live to serve.  I want to be a servant.  Lord, use me.

Rejoice and be glad.

Holy Bible, New International Version®, NIV® Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.®

Oh my soul...

Today is a good day.

To elaborate, God is in control.  He has forgiven me.  He heals me.  He has redeemed me.

I am currently experiencing some rather inconvenient (not painful or sickening) side effects from the chemo therapy, at least what my research on the symptoms potentially links as an allergic reaction to the newest drug which was added to my cocktail last weekend.  The inconvenient side effect: itchy palms of my hands and soles of my feet, which has expanded to general itching all over.

When discussing the issue this morning with my (x)Wife, we were prayerfully discussing (through texts) options and claiming God's truths and promises.  I was given Psalm 103: 1-4.  It is the truth.

Psalm 103:1-4 (KJV)

"Bless the Lord, O my soul: and all that is within me, bless his holy name.  Bless the Lord, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits: Who forgiveth all thine iniquities; who healeth all thy diseases; Who redeemeth thy life from destruction; who crowneth thee with lovingkindness and tender mercies;"

Every part of us need to be praising God for what He has done (His benefits):

• He forgives us!
• He heals us!
• He redeems us!
• He loves us!

Therein lies our focus! (Had to use this. ;) )

Rejoice and be glad!  With this truth, how can any day NOT be a good day?

Make Every Effort

2 Peter 1:5-11 (NIV)

"For this very reason, make every effort to add to your faith goodness; and to goodness, knowledge; and to knowledge, self-control; and to self-control, perseverance; and to perseverance, godliness; and to godliness, mutual affection; and to mutual affection, love.  For if you possess these qualities in increasing measure, they will keep you from being ineffective and unproductive in your knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ.  But whoever does not have them is nearsighted and blind, forgetting that they have been cleansed from their past sins."

"Therefore, my brothers and sisters, make every effort to confirm your calling and election. For if you do these things, you will never stumble, and you will receive a rich welcome into the eternal kingdom of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ."

Holy Bible, New International Version®, NIV® Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.®


First and foremost, I must apologize to Francis Chan from whom this is brutally plagiarized, though with my twist on things added. (His Youtube version in two parts can be found here and here)

So now, into what I wish to say.

1. For this very reason:  Just like when the word "THEREFORE" is used in the Bible, this phrase should cause us to look in the earlier verses for context. (When you see "therefore" read earlier passages to see what it is "there for.")  Here, we see in verses 3 and 4 (NIV) the following:

"His divine power has given us everything we need for a godly life through our knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness. Through these he has given us his very great and precious promises, so that through them you may participate in the divine nature, having escaped the corruption in the world caused by evil desires."

So now we know the "very reason" which Peter is speaking: we have everything we need to live a godly life through our knowledge of Him (Jesus Christ), thereby we can experience the promises He has for us and we can be like Him (participate in the divine nature) because when we grow in our knowledge of Him, we shed our evil desires (sin less and less). This in and of itself is a wonderful message and should motivate to "taste and see that the Lord is good," (Psalm 34:8-KJV) and "study to shew thyself approved, a workman who needeth not be ashamed, rightly dividing the Word of Truth" (2 Timothy 2:15-KJV).

2. make every effort: the basis of all we do should be towards this goal. Our very being should cry out for this purpose. As EP (Exalted Patriarch-my father) states there is an equation for this:

Focused Intensity (fi) over Time (t) plus God (G) equals Unstoppable Momentum (UM).  Make every effort (focused intensity) consistently (over Time) prayerfully (plus God) and the result will be forward progress that is unstoppable!

3. add to your faith goodness:  Faith is the building block of everything.  Without faith, we cannot believe; without belief, we are lost. Once we have established our faith, the next step towards Christian maturity is goodness.  "A good man out of the good treasure of the heart bringeth forth good things: and an evil man out of the evil treasure bringeth forth evil things." (Matthew 12:35) We have been given a good treasure through Christ, we should be working on being good and not evil.  If we call ourselves Christians, should our goal be anything other than being mistaken for Jesus?!

4. and to goodness, knowledge: Once we have started working towards being good (at least avoiding evil) the accumulation of knowledge is needed.  How do we acquire knowledge? The Word of God: daily reading and study, sitting under a Bible-teaching pastor, disciplining under a mature Christian, and prayer.

5. and to knowledge, self-control: Self-control defined by thefreedictionary.com , "Control of one's emotions, desires, or actions by one's own will." I have a problem with this definition, simply because by MY own will I cannot control myself.  Following MY will leads to succumbing to temptations.  Prayer to God for strength when confronted with life's little moments of weakness is the only thing that can accomplish "self-control."  Staying in the Word and practicing the previous mentioned disciplines will assist, but it can never be through our own will that we control ourselves effectively and in a Godly manner.

6. and to self-control, perseverance: Perseverance, stick-to-it-ness.  Keep with it. It is said by behavioral scientists that doing something consistently for 2-4 weeks, and it becomes a habit. Don't quit! Keep moving forward.

7. and to perseverance, godliness: By this point, we should be striving to be like God in all areas of our lives.  Our character should be similar to the Father.  We should be displaying the Fruit of the Spirit .

8. and to godliness, mutual affection: A general concern and care for others.  ("A man who has friends must show himself friendly" Proverbs 18:24-NKJV) I cannot demonstrate mutual affection by sequestering myself in my cave and hiding behind my books/technology for company. (See yesterday's post!! )

9. and to mutual affection, love: Love is a verb.  Love requires action.  There is no such thing as passive love (trust me, that will cost you everything if you try it).

10. For if you possess these qualities in increasing measure: As we persevere in the establishing of these qualities, they will grow in us.

11. they will keep you from being ineffective and unproductive in your knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ: As these characteristics grow in us, our ability to accomplish Kingdom building tasks improves.  We have greater testimony and display the nature of our Creator.

12. But whoever does not have them is nearsighted and blind: Without these qualities in our life, we cannot see the "Big Picture" we only see that which is right in front of us, or worse we cannot see at all.  Remember, blindness is an analogy for lost/unsaved/in sin in the Bible.  Opening of eyes/restoring sight is salvation.

13. forgetting that they have been cleansed from past sins: We should never forget the price that Jesus paid to cleanse us of our sins.  Do not keep living in the past and reliving our sinful nature.  We are a new creation, we have put off the sinful old man and put on the new man.

A paraphrase of 2 Peter 1:5-9 from the Message:

"So don't lose a minute in building on what you've been given, complementing your basic faith with good character, spiritual understanding, alert discipline, passionate patience, reverent wonder, warm friendliness, and generous love, each dimension fitting into and developing the others. With these qualities active and growing in your lives, no grass will grow under your feet, no day will pass without its reward as you mature in your experience of our Master Jesus. Without these qualities you can't see what's right before you, oblivious that your old sinful life has been wiped off the books."

The Message Bible Copyright © 1993, 1994, 1995, 1996, 2000, 2001, 2002 by Eugene H. Peterson

I am not normally a fan of paraphrased editions, but I like the way the spiritual foundations are stated here.  For comparison:
1. faith = basic faith
2. goodness = good character
3. knowledge = spiritual understanding
4. self-control = alert discipline (I REALLY like this one)
5. perseverance = passionate patience (Again well stated!!!)
6. godliness = reverent wonder
7. mutual affection = warm friendliness
8. love = generous love

SELFISH PRAYER REQUESTS OF THE DAY:
Standing order:
Healing from the colon cancer and metastasized liver.
Complete reconciliation with my wife (that I can communicate effectively and love her as she deserves).
Health and safety of my children.

New-ish:
Side effect free chemo round (even with new, more aggressive drugs).
Good report from pre-chemo blood test concerning tumor markers (reducing to reflect my healing and good blood cell counts to keep immune system strong).
Daughter's broken tooth and pending repair (pain and drama free appointment Friday at 1:50 EST and cost not too crazy).
Medical bills which are accumulating (that I can return to work to pay these).
My personal/spiritual growth.
My motivation to work-out. (1 Timothy 4:8-NIV "For physical training is of some value, but godliness has value for all things, holding promise for both the present life and the life to come.")

Workout Report
New
Walked 1.74 miles last night in 31 minutes. Had to pause to take photos at GW Bush's childhood home which was on my route.

Repeated
Since June 3, have lost 22 pounds, don't know how since I have not been active and have eaten whatever.
Currently at 208 pounds, lowest weight since December 2003.
Wouldn't mind getting down to about 185, but slowly!!
Training for the "26.2 with Donna, The National Marathon to Fight Breast Cancer" February 17, 2013 in Jacksonville, FL.  Join me there!